I get up at 6:00 a.m. and don't stop until 9:00 p.m.

It's work from 7-4, class from 4:30-9.

But it's okay because my physics teacher plays jazz music for the first five minutes of class.

And the seal on the refrigerator in my apartment makes the most satisfying noise when you close it.

Today I broke a string of 256 consecutive days of seeing Matthew.

& I don't like that one bit.

As of now

Officially living in Provo. Officially loving life.

I'm just chillin' alone in my new apartment right now. Our contract began on Tuesday, so that's when I thought everyone would move it, but it's just been me so far..I'm all set up and the rest of the place is empty except the cupboard I decided would belong to my food. It's kind of lonely.

I told my mom that this would be the last time I'd move out of her house. It's weird that I'm officially on my own for the rest of time. I thought it might feel different than this. I think I just have some getting used to to do.

I feel like living 27 minutes away from Matthew is going to make a huge difference in the amount of time I get to spend with him, not that a full time job and going to school full time will have anything to do with that...

Here goes nothing.

And it was great.

Last night my old roommates and friends from SUU came down and we had a sleepover!!!

The night was filled with endless conversation. Although some of us didn't get along well while living together, we were always able to have really good late-night talks and it felt really good to do that again. These girls really are stellar, and I know I still have a lot to learn from all of them.

*Disclaimers on the picture: 1: We forgot to take pictures the night before, so the only picture we had time to take was right after breakfast..that's why we all look our best. 2: Kelsey is not pictured because she only had about 45 minutes to spend with us because it was either her little brother's brother's birthday party, or her boyfriend had a family thing she had to go to. She claimed both excuses. 

[ha. love you anyway, Kels.]

SO good to see and hang out with these girls whom I've been missing all summer long.

We were up until three thirty in morning, which pretty much goes without saying, and then I got up at eight o'clock to feed Nathan, so I've been kickin' it zombie style all day long. 

Matthew, however, insisted that I go mini-golfing with him and Nathan at Trafalga. 

So that's exactly what we did.

I know Nathan loved getting out of the house and we all had so much fun.

Wanna know something else that's great?

Matthew hit a grand slam at his game today.

We talked about our dream life of him going pro and playing in the MLB.

We'll move to Texas and I'll go to every game with our 6 children all dressed in his team apparel.

Hopefully he'll play for the Braves.

{slash the Indians. :] }

Cross your fingers for us!

oops.

I guess I spoke a leeeetle too soon yesterday, because pretty soon after I clicked the 'publish post' button, things turned, to under-exaggerate, a tiny bit sour. 

Now, no one needs, nor, I'm positive, wants to hear every detail about my perfectly ruined Sabbath, but I will say this: going to bed very emotional and sad leads to waking up very emotional and sad, and it's not a mood easily left throughout the day. 

However.

God gives girls big brothers. I'm not sure how, but my brothers always know when I'm down, OR...they don't, and they are simply wonderfully thoughtful at the most meaningful of times. What I mean is, I came down to my room after, what I felt like was, the longest day thus far in my life, and I found this on my bed:

They're bright and yellow and mine.
It's amazing what support can do.

Thanks, Derek. 

They completely made my day.

Love, Kay.

Here comes the sun (doo doo doo doo)

 I'm shaken. Completely rattled. In a good way. I'm in love with life and its unexpected turns.

It's tossing me around and I'm tumbling beautifully, just enjoying the ride. I'm so happy, it's hard to breathe.

This happiness halts me, physically stopping me in my tracks, and forces me to take it all in. I feel like the luckiest person 

in the world right now. Not everything is going right though, there are things going wrong, failures occurring, and things 

being neglected, yet everything is wonderful. Every single thing is beautiful. My perspective is getting better. 

Every misstep, is still a step. A step in my direction,and I know exactly which direction I want to go.
Its nice to take my foot off the gas for a whileon this journey, slowing enough to appreciate while still progressing.

I'm loving life. I'm loving myself. I'm loving every moment. 

I dare you all to feel the same.